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Wanna see my badges?

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Cast On's has an hilarious idea:

Welcome to the Illustrious Order of Cast On Knitting Scouts!

Wherein it is acknowledged that members are:

  • Not opposed to alcohol.
  • Into badges.
  • Mostly in agreement that there is no right way to knit.
  • Committed to diligent positive and accurate presentation of knitting and knitters, to editors, producers, directors, and those generally presumed to be part of "The Media" in an effort to close the gap of Public Knitting Literacy.

 

Here are the badges I've earned thus far, and the reasons why I believe that I earned them.

  

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The "Knitting Whilst Under the Influence" Badge - This applies to both actual knitting under the influence, as well as achieving moments of stunning intellectual clarity about ones knitting under the influence. Presumes talking about knitting whilst under the influence a given.

 

Why do I deserve this badge? Many wonderful things have I knitted while drinking cosmos, margaritas, and wine. Things look great at night, but in the morning... FROGGED.  

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The "I Can Be an Asshole When It Comes To Knitting" Badge - In which the recipient is so passionate, opinionated and entirely convinced of his/her own superior knowledge about all things knitting, that he/she may appear pompous, rude, or self-righteous.

 

Why do I deserve this badge? I take my knitting everywhere with me. I think that sometimes people think I am not interested when they are talking to me because I seem engaged in a conversation with my needles; however, I tend to pay MORE attention to what's going on around me when I am knitting.

 

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The "Proselytize Knitting" Badge - A requirement for all Knitting Scouts, the recipient must do his or her bit to present knitting in a positive light, whilst at the same time avoiding all references to "hipness", grandmothers, and yoga.

Why do I deserve this badge? Ask any of my students. I recommend knitting to all of them.

 

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The "MacGyver" Badge (Level One) - The recipient must demonstrate clever use of a non-knitting tool in a knitting-related scenario. For instance, recipient has used paper clips as stitch markers, or successfully whittled and then utilized bamboo skewers as dpns.

Why do I deserve this badge? I have used paper clips as stitch markers and as cable needles, a plastic needle as a cable needle, a coffee mug as a skein holder, and a dining room chair as a yarn swift.

 

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The "MacGyver" Badge (Level Two) - The recipient must demonstrate clever use of a knitting tool in a non-knitting-related scenario. For instance, recipient has used a strand of Regia Bamboo to slice cheese, or repaired a small appliance with a metal knitting needle.

 Why do I deserve this badge? have used needles as Q-Tips, (I know, gross), yarn as a chip clip, a pencil as a drop spindle, and a needle as a back scratcher.

 

This is making me sick. Really.

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6/16 FINAL UPDATE: After several calls by neighbors, the SPCA FINALLY picked up these two beautiful girls on June 16th. I haven't called to follow up on them. I hope they will be adopted by people who are willing to care for them.

 

4/28 Update: After a visit from the SPCA, the pups were moved into a bigger cage. Still not adequate, IMHO, but at least they can move now.

 

 

 

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This atrocity is occurring at the house next door to me. Other than the few hours that I bring them into my yard and give them water, food, and attention, I think these puppies are in this cage almost all the time. Animal control isn't open until Monday morning. Anybody out there. . .  please come and take these two darling chow puppies. 

If I had my way, they would be sitting in my house with me now, but... 

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I need a swift!

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020.JPGPoor Aaron. He was lucky enough to help me make some skeins of flax. Doesn't he look thrilled to be helping his DM?

Covet this poster I made!

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